Thursday, May 1, 2014

The two most powerful words.

I have been very fortunate in my lifetime that I have had several people that I can look up to different ways, either physically, mentally and/or spiritually.

Recently, I met a new person to add to my list. I never thought she would challenge me as much as she has. I thought I had my life all together. I have a good job, my health, loving family, and clearly the unconditional love of my dog so what more did I need in life.  The more and more I talked to her, the more I realized I have no clue what I am doing with my life. I was basically living in a state of content and comfort.

 I was going through the motions of life. The zeal and excitement I once had somehow disappeared.

Together we discovered my biggest weakness is my confidence. I had not realized that I had spent so many years serving others and pleasing others needs that I had neglected my own. I had failed to build myself up. It has always been natural for me to be personable and approachable so naturally others sought me out when they needed something from me and I did because I like pleasing people. That caused me to neglect myself.

The fear of failing had made me lack my confidence.

It all started when I told her the story of how I entered a 5k many years ago. The last half mile, I was followed by an police escort as they were clearing the road again for traffic because I was last. Yeah,  I am pretty sure I could have died of humility that morning. I realized since that event I hadn't really wanted to begin new adventures in life because I was afraid of feeling that same sense of failure. I didn't want to push or challenge myself because I was afraid of coming in last again.

I am still not sure how she did it, but now I don't want to fail her because she has truly helped me be a better me. I have never felt more confident of who I am and what I am capable of.  Don't get me wrong, it is still a work in progress and I still don't know what I am doing with my life, but I loving every minute trying to figure it out. Living in comfort was just plain boring.
I would have never imagined putting myself out there and going on so many first dates in the last year. None of them have ended up with a ring on the finger but each one thought me more who I am and what I wanted in life.

I would have never imagined have imagined that last week I ran a 5k in 36 minutes which is huge for me. I thought I was going to throw up afterwards but that is beside the point. 

I would have never imagined the inner strength that I have inside of me. I have caught myself speaking up without hesitantion, standing up for what I believe in, challenging others and even mentoring again.
The beauty of it all, having gone through that slump helped me recognize how powerful the little things in life are that so many of us take for granted.

With confidence I can say I am a better person because I know she will always be on the sidelines cheering me on.  Today I say, "Thank you" to one of my newest fans. When was the last time you sincerely said "Thank you" to someone help you be a better you.